Paul and I had the following conversation last night, prompted by Paul’s difficulty in dealing with his friend’s commitment to dying and refusal of any form of prayer or healing.
PAUL: Why did I go through the day, today, without direction—floating like a leaf on the wind of (so-and-so’s) manipulation? Why did I not feel the gumption to interrupt it, free myself from it and stay joined with you? To say it better, what can I do if this happens again? How can I override the inclination to take no action and just quietly sit with whatever the bad feelings are? Being rudderless is an awful experience.
RAJ: Paul, whenever you bring your attention to the Holy Spirit, you are given a focus of attention. This solves the problem of being rudderless. This solves the problem of meaninglessness. It is instantaneous and simple—always!
If you ask and do not hear, it is not because He has not answered. The subject for your attention is never withheld. If you do not hear, something is missing, and that “something” is your willingness to hear. This is never not true. Therefore, you have only one choice available to you and that is to abandon your resistance and ask again. And you must do this whether you feel like it or not!
Not feeling like being conscious is not a “proper” activity of consciousness. In fact, it is a topic incapable of being considered or experienced as an activity of consciousness, and it occurs only at the mental invitation of another who would have you join in the abandonment of focus and join in the stupid rest of simple emotion. Then, and only then, can it seem to be considered or experienced.
When you feel the onslaught of fear or guilt, you must immediately turn to the Holy Spirit and ask a question. Any question! The Holy Spirit’s response will be a focus of attention, as I said, which will undo the nebulousness and resulting immobilization and free you to be consciously responsive—alive to life as an active participant in it. You’re going to have to be willing to recognize the signs of mental manipulation—of ego influence—so that you catch them instantaneously and let them be replaced with God-directed active attention.
Do not tolerate vagueness of the mind. Do not be foolish enough to suggest to yourself that such vagueness is a mind at peace—a much-desired goal. A mind truly at peace, a mind in bliss is in an active state of attention and participation with everything of which it as aware. It is not excited, anxious or fearful. It is not exhilarated, but experiences everything deeply, fully, meaningfully. Again, it is engaged in active relationship with everything of which it is aware. Because fear is not present, this living, vital conscious experience experiences its perfect invulnerability—it’s profound safety—and that is the meaning of peace.
Again, do not ever validate the suggestion that the experience of peace is one of detachment, the absence of involvement, a freedom from relationship with everything. Do not believe that involvement will always involve vulnerability and stress in one form or another and that the purpose of meditation is to become free from that.
True peace, real invulnerability, allows one to be so naturally and intuitively present with everything that all relationships are an incredible dance of harmony—spontaneously and in the moment. With no need to calculate how to behave in order to secure one’s safety, and because one is joined with the Holy Spirit, the attention is filled with the ability to be involved, to be in relationship with everything with clarity, and the Father’s creativity is beautifully fulfilled.
Peace is not a hiding place. Peace is simply the absence of fear and guilt. Safety, invulnerability, is the divinely normal and uninterruptible state of Being which clearly registers with you in the absence of fear and guilt. But when peace is used as a hiding place, the act leaves fear and guilt untouched—still in place, still a threat.
Peace is not a kind of Valium, nor any other drug which simply masks the fear and guilt by dulling the mind in a state of fuzziness. Used as a drug, though, peace is an act of will by means of which the mind determines itself to be strong enough to hide them, while true peace is the abandonment of willfulness (in which fear and guilt abide) and in their actual absence profound safety, wholeness, inviolability is experienced—Truth is revealed!
Fear and guilt cannot be talked away. The Power of Positive Thinking cannot get rid of them. They are not ideas which can be counteracted, modified or replaced by other ideas. They are false sensations aroused by the assertion of independence: “But Father, I’d rather see it my way.” “I’d rather do it my way.” “I’d rather determine what everything means.” They are, therefore, undone by abandoning the independence, by yielding up the imaginative position of “authorizer.” And that is the only way it can be done!
Here is the tricky part: Just as you couldn’t get a divorce from the Father without another joining you in the act of mutual agreement to see, do and determine everything’s meaning “on your own,” you cannot initiate fear and guilt in yourself, by yourself! It occurs by invitation only. If you are experiencing fear or guilt, it is because another has invited you to feel it, validate it and make commitment to it as actual by constantly reconfirming the divorce.
You are deceived when you think that your feelings are yours—that they started in you, reflect you and declare you. Fear and guilt, in their multitudinous forms, will bind you unmercifully as long as you claim them to be yours. Until you can see that they are not yours, but are the fear and guilt of others inviting you to join them in their misery because they accepted the invitation of yet others to join in their misery, you will not have the perspective to break the chain and not pass the invitation on!
What’s more, you will not see that the solution does not lie in dealing with the fear or the guilt, nor with the others inviting you to participate in new fears, but in your abandoning your independence from your Father—annulling your divorce by joining with the Holy Spirit.
Fear and guilt are like hot potatoes! Someone tosses one to you, and as you complain about the pain you quickly toss it on to someone else, waiting to hear their cries of pain as well, thereby knowing that they understand yours. Such camaraderie is foolishness, and that is all! And the human condition continues on this irrational basis.
You’re going to have to be diligent, here. When the negativity presents itself in your mind, do not assume you’re having a bad day. Do not get mad at so-and-so for aggressively messing with you mentally. And do not try to find out what is wrong with you in order for you to be having this experience.
DO THE TWO-STEP!
Ask me or the Holy Spirit a question. Abandon your independence and join! Remember that your brother, the one making the invitation, has no Authority. Therefore his invitation can never rise above the level of a “suggestion,” and you must ask yourself whether you’re going to choose to be miserable by accepting the imposition of a substanceless suggestion or not cooperate with such an imposition by reestablishing your connection with your right mind—the Holy Spirit!
Then, if it turns out to be work, do the work!